Happy Sunday Clanettes. Not a lot of exercise to report here this week, as I mentioned in my last post we have had a virus and I am struggling with the tail end of it.
Monday
Swim - 40 lengths in 30 mins
Tues, Weds, Thursday, Friday and Saturday
'rest' days
Sunday
Paul and I went to the gym together this morning, and after a week of illness I struggled through 4k on the treadmill and then a brief swim. However it was good to get out and get some movement going.
Summary:
W/E 02.12.12
Cycle: 0
Run: 4k treadmill run
Swim: 1 x 1k and 1 x a few lengths..
I don't talk about my weight in terms of numbers. I have never once admitted to what I used to weigh (I was ashamed) or indeed what I weigh now I am officially at 'goal', so I just wanted to take a deep breath, and note the following:
I am 6ft tall, and at my heaviest I weighed over 19st/120.6kgs
At the start of this year I weighed just over 17st/108kgs
I now weigh 13st 11lbs/87.5kgs
I am not ashamed of those numbers anymore, they can't hurt me. I will always be 6ft, I will always be bigger and weigh more than most people, even when I am at my ideal weight. That is who I am. Those numbers can only inspire me - just like the photo I have besides my toilet sink (!) of me at my biggest, reminding every time I go to the loo of what I have achieved, and what I continue to achieve.
What I am now deliberating is what I do now I'm at goal. The trouble with a goal is that once you achieve it, its not what you thought it would be! 12 months ago I would have given anything, ANYTHING to be this weight - a comfy size 14!! A dream if you ask me. But this size 14 doesn't look how I thought it would, so I need to add some toning to my cycling/running/swimming.
I'll be honest too. Christmas eating scares me. We have a great food routine going on here, and it works for us. But already there are chocs for advent calendars, mince pies for festive do's and salted nuts sitting in the cupboard.. I don't know how to deal with Christmas and be responsible.. you know? So I'm going to do the best I can. I will track all my food honestly and make sure I don't miss a workout. My motto for December is going to be 'If I burnt it, I earnt it'!
This little numbers outburst is dedicated 4 ways, in my true oscar speech stylee:
To Paul, who started it all by buying a bike, way back when. Who kicks me out of bed first thing in the morning, who gets home from work and kicks me out of the house when its mad at kidlet bedtime. Who loves me no matter what I weigh. Who loved me when I didn't love myself.
To my parents, who have been responsible in so many ways for all of my successes. For treating me to new clothes when my old clothes were falling off me and I was in denial. For spurring me on and continuing to believe in me.
To Lucy, an amazing lady and a fabulous friend, who was there at the start with me, who made that first tentative suggestion.. Who knew where it would lead! Lucy, who continues to inspire and motivate me. Who understands all of my little nuances and isn't afraid to ponder them with me.
And I also dedicate it to you, you know who you are, you talked to me this week. You who are just starting to consider a journey to change. There is nothing you can not achieve x x
Do you have any good before/after pictures? Would LOVE to see them! Christmas food worrying me too. I am focusing on keeping the activities UP (ie running)and making a promise to myself to enjoy every bit of Christmas food I make, avoiding the shop-bought rubbish and absolutely, 100% dedicating myself to the cause again in January. Which I don't think will be hard :-)
ReplyDeleteOh and adding - you've lost nearly 6 stone? :-O OMG! I really had no idea. That is something else - well done you!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I think you've been doing an amazing job exercising and being conscious of taking care of your health. Your efforts show not only in the weight loss numbers but also in the fitness improvements that you have been witnessing.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean about the numbers and about how sometimes it doesn't feel like enough, even when the weight loss has been significant. I think it is important to stay positive and see new goals as a challenge and not as a source of frustration, particularly because you HAVE come so far and are doing really well :)